I dosing… two sites to check out

As I write this post I’m listening to the Idose’s Inspiration track ( to help me get the creative juices flowing for this post ).  Idose is a website offering streams of Binaural beats for anyone to listen to for free.

This website was recommended to me by my internets obsessive boyfriend Rob. He also shared with me  a few weeks  ago an blog post titled 10 Keys to a Successful Romantic Relationship from Stepcase Lifehack blog.  The author’s  romantic suggestions in my opinion are a must read for any one in a relationship.

I also found some other gems on the blog like  Back to basics: Procrastination- The good, the bad and the ugly ( since I planned on writing this post a week ago… I really needed procrastination advice.)

Anyway, next time you are feel like procrastinating mentally exploring check out those two websites… and waste your time in a semi-productive way

Cherishing Love

Maybe its just me but sometimes love makes me sick to my stomach. I tense up, I stress out and I want to run away from it. Just like any other strong emotion sometimes I just can’t sit with it. I can’t *be* with it…
I have done a lot pondering in this blog about  finding true love. By lately, I been more interested in how to deal with love once you have it. Especially if when you think you have found the right mate but the time, solution or place isn’t right. When do you fight to be with someone and when is it just too hard?
Right now, I’m in a long distance relationship. But at the moment it doesn’t count as a long distance since he is now right next to me. I should be happy I get to spend almost 2 months living with my mate. But sometimes I can’t stay in the moment. My mind wants to rush ahead to when we have to part.   Few night ago I found myself stressing out bout the situation until it occur there was only one thing I could do. Be in that moment. I went from worrying to just enjoying cuddling…
I believe that almost every problem can be eased by applying simple meditation technique..even problems with the heart. By taking a breath when I was panicky and  be present with mate.
The second question is how do you know if a relationship is worth the effort. I think this too can be answer if we are present with how we feel. Listen to your heart and mind honestly and you will know if this person is right for us.  I think we ( ( know I do) sometimes lie to ourselves. We see the red flags in a relationship but ignore them or we know the person in a good mate but run because of some fear. If I am honest about my current relationship the only  worry i have is the distance. If I am really honest, I am looking for problems because it’s my nature to be suspicious of happiness…
So again I don’t really have any of the answers, just more to think about. I can only suggest if you are feeling stressed in relationship…Breath and be present in the feelings so you can understand  them fully. Also, even if you have no worries remember to cherish every moment with your mate because the next minute isn’t promised to any of us.. So take a sec to feel their hand against yours…to look at that face you fall in love this .. Just be there with them…

So you think you can’t meditate?

When I mention to people that I meditate I usually hear one of two comments. ” Oh, that’s wonderful… I wish I could do that”. or ” I tried to meditate but I just can’t do it”. In my experience the biggest obstacle people have towards meditation is that they believe that their mind is to cluttered for the practice. They say ” I just can’t stop thinking so much” or ” I can’t sit still for that long”. Here’s a little news flash to help take off some of the pressure of maintaining a meditation practice: It doesn’t matter how crazy or F***ed up your mind is, you Can meditate. Saying that you can’t meditate because you have a distracted and cluttered mind is like saying you can’t do yoga because you are not flexible. Or you can’t go to the doctor because you are sick. Yoga builds flexibility, doctors heal the sick and meditation ( among other things) heals and creates a more flexible and less cluttered mind. Those of us who are always in our mind and always stressed out can benefit the most from meditation practice.

I use to beat myself up when I couldn’t clear my mind during meditation. Then one day I was having a horrible meditation session where I just can’t stay focus on my breath. I fought with myself, struggled and thought to myself, ” this a waste of time….grrr.. you aren’t accomplishing anything here”. Then, after my meditation period was up, I opened my eyes and I was calmer and more clear then before my practice. I realized that even my so-called worst practices had wonderful and important benefits. Sometimes, they are obvious and sometimes not so much.

What is important in building a meditation practice is letting go of the need to accomplish. Remember, this is not a project, job or an assignment- it’s a practice. There are no goals other than to practice consistently. Be gentle with yourself. So if you can’t do thirty minutes.. do ten minutes or even five. Don’t evaluate your meditation by what happens during the practice… wait a few weeks or even a few months and see the effects it’s having on your actual life. Don’t try to control or stop thoughts – Don’t even expect that you will cure yourself of thinking ( don’t expect anything, if that’s possible). Watch thoughts —See how they come and go instead of fighting with them. Soon you see how your thoughts are always changing, are fleeting and are nothing to worry about. And maybe in time you will notice a little space between those thoughts. Your mind may still be racing but in time it won’t be so fast.

I’m going to stop here but I will try to write an example of a simple meditation in the next post…