“A related concept is that of the twin flame or twin soul – thought to be the ultimate soulmate, the one and only other half of one’s soul, for which all souls are driven to find and join.”
Note: what Ihave written about soul mates is .. well… sort of long. So I’m going to break thissubject into two posts
Part 1:My rant on my failures with finding a soul mate
When I met my first crush, I heard a strange ringing. Less than a year later, he was my faithful first boyfriend. After his adorable request that we go steady, I decided that the ringing was a sign.A heavenly sign that our meeting was meant to be and that he was my soul mate.Yeah Right… Perhaps, our relationship was meant to be by some cruel trick of the universe. But, he was certainly not my soulmate. Our whirlwind romance lasted a mere six months. Not to worry though,I would hear the ringing bells of love again. This time around, the intuitive sound struck me in 9th grade; when I was around a petite and plump boy who resembled a kid named Carmen of South Park ,Colorado.
You might have guess that at first, I wasn’t attracted to the cartoon-like and height-challenged young man. In the beginning , I tried my best to ignored the persistent ringing in my mind sparked by him.Yet, the ringing noise would again ring true. After a year long friendship, I found myself falling for a guy I had to squat down to kiss. I was quite comfortable in my romantic relationship with him. After all, we had been friends for a while and he was a really good guy. Soon, I fell in love and began to think ” This time I got it right. He has to be my soulmate”. Sadly, my dreams of a happily ever after with the little guy would never come to pass.
Side note : If you are offended by my shortie insults on my ex’s behalf. Don’t be.Although in the beginning, hes eemed like a perfect angel, he turned out to be a little meanie. One of his favorite pastimes was proving that he was smarter than me because he was an honor student ( meaning: he knew how to cheat and his mother was on the PTA) and I was not ( meaning: I didn’t have school connections). Now, the only revenge I can get after his constant cracks on my intelligence is dogging his lack of tallness on a blog.If you are still offended: Still don’t worry. He is a genius and geniuses don’t waste their brain power on reading blogs.
So… Anyway… once again, I was wrong about what the gods of love had planned for me. Needless to say, we broke-up and I moved on to the next relationship train wreck. Enter Mr. Evil ( he would actually like this description). When I met Satan ( yes, the devil exists and he is a ghetto yet redneck suburbanite) I didn’t just hear bells– I heard wedding bells. By the age of 19, I was engaged to Evil. I was so in love, I was sure with every bone in my body that he was my true love, my soulmate. I loved him so much that I held on even when he proved he wasn’t the guy I thought he was. I held on because my heart, my gut and my intuition all told me, he was the person I was meant to be with. So, I held on until there was nothing left. Until all I was holding on to was a bag of regrets, pieces of a broken heart and my shredded dignity.
Unfortunately, I was born with the fatal disease of hopeless romantic-ness.I had always believed in White Knights, soul mates anddestiny. But after being kicked in my gut-feeling by my Ex -fiance’ , How could I continue to believe in fated love?
And what about that ringing sound that always went off when I met the ” next contestant” ( yes, I know I stole that from Nickelback).Was psychic hearing a sign of meant to be love or a warningthat I should avoid the approaching fellow at all costs? Or maybe I was just crazy and hearing things. Maybe I should give up on love and signs.
Suddenly, a girl so sure about the power of love, who believed that fairy tales could come true,was having serious doubts about the whole soul mate thing. Does everyone had a soul mate? If so, why are so many people alone? And… Where is my soul mate?
Coming up in Part Two: I will get to the point…maybe…